elizabeth

19 Oct 2018 143 views
 
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photoblog image Feline Friday

Feline Friday

 

As my Beautiful Bella transitions into whatever is next for her... I'm spending as much time as I can with her on my lap, her purr vibrating my heart as it has for more than twelve years.  It gives me time to reflect on how this wild, indelible soul has enriched my own with her unique brand of love, humor and energy.  Bella and Raina have helped me through some major life changes in those twelve years , and I have so many wonderful memories.

 

She had just turned two years old, when I brought her and Raina from the Bengal cattery to my home. The breeder had told me she was sweet and playful, but "wasn't much to look at". Which is why she'd been spayed and was looking for her forever home.  When I walked into that house, Bella reached out to me from the back of the couch and I swear I thought she was the most beautiful cat I'd ever seen... and I still feel that way.

 

She's also one of the smartest cats I've ever known.  She tries so hard to communicate with me, using different vocalizations in different situations - it's my own failing as a human when I don't understand.  She can open doors with handles, and is maddeningly easy to train.  I will miss her burrowing under the covers at night, resting her head on my arm and looking into my eyes as she purrs herself to sleep.  I will miss the way, only until the past month, she'd have "crazy time" every night... running around the house, tearing up and down the stairs, yowling and pouncing on her prey (her toys and my stuffed animals...).  She'd start play fights with Raina... who always finished them.  She'd meet me, and anyone else, at the door - and it didn't matter if she knew you or not... if you gave her a treat you were her friend.  I love how much she talks... she's a very chatty kitty... only wish I could turn the volume down sometimes! 

 

Those of us who love cats understand that you have to be invited into a cats heart... they don't take to just anyone.  And when you find yourself in that very special, very privileged place it's particularly difficult to let go of the small, soft, elegant being that is her physical home.  But my Bella and I share a unique connection - and her spirit will be with me always - and knowing this will be my last day, and last night with her - I'm trying to hold on to that thought.  As C.S. Lewis said... "You don't HAVE a soul.  You ARE a soul, you have a body".  I'll  no longer feel the warmth of her sweet feline form, but will always have her spirit with me. 

 

So long Itty Bitty Bella Kitty.  Frank, Raina and I will miss you terribly.    XOX

 

photoblog image kitties 13 aug 2012 (2).jpg

 

 

photoblog image Kitties Jan 2014 2 (2).jpg

 

I don't know how I'll feel in the coming days or how quickly I'll recover...  my apologies if I seem to disappear for a bit...

 

 

Feline Friday

 

As my Beautiful Bella transitions into whatever is next for her... I'm spending as much time as I can with her on my lap, her purr vibrating my heart as it has for more than twelve years.  It gives me time to reflect on how this wild, indelible soul has enriched my own with her unique brand of love, humor and energy.  Bella and Raina have helped me through some major life changes in those twelve years , and I have so many wonderful memories.

 

She had just turned two years old, when I brought her and Raina from the Bengal cattery to my home. The breeder had told me she was sweet and playful, but "wasn't much to look at". Which is why she'd been spayed and was looking for her forever home.  When I walked into that house, Bella reached out to me from the back of the couch and I swear I thought she was the most beautiful cat I'd ever seen... and I still feel that way.

 

She's also one of the smartest cats I've ever known.  She tries so hard to communicate with me, using different vocalizations in different situations - it's my own failing as a human when I don't understand.  She can open doors with handles, and is maddeningly easy to train.  I will miss her burrowing under the covers at night, resting her head on my arm and looking into my eyes as she purrs herself to sleep.  I will miss the way, only until the past month, she'd have "crazy time" every night... running around the house, tearing up and down the stairs, yowling and pouncing on her prey (her toys and my stuffed animals...).  She'd start play fights with Raina... who always finished them.  She'd meet me, and anyone else, at the door - and it didn't matter if she knew you or not... if you gave her a treat you were her friend.  I love how much she talks... she's a very chatty kitty... only wish I could turn the volume down sometimes! 

 

Those of us who love cats understand that you have to be invited into a cats heart... they don't take to just anyone.  And when you find yourself in that very special, very privileged place it's particularly difficult to let go of the small, soft, elegant being that is her physical home.  But my Bella and I share a unique connection - and her spirit will be with me always - and knowing this will be my last day, and last night with her - I'm trying to hold on to that thought.  As C.S. Lewis said... "You don't HAVE a soul.  You ARE a soul, you have a body".  I'll  no longer feel the warmth of her sweet feline form, but will always have her spirit with me. 

 

So long Itty Bitty Bella Kitty.  Frank, Raina and I will miss you terribly.    XOX

 

photoblog image kitties 13 aug 2012 (2).jpg

 

 

photoblog image Kitties Jan 2014 2 (2).jpg

 

I don't know how I'll feel in the coming days or how quickly I'll recover...  my apologies if I seem to disappear for a bit...

 

 

comments (27)

Elle est magnifique, j'adore ses jolis yeux verts.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: I'm glad you agree... I think she's one of the prettiest cats I've ever seen.
  • Bonnie
  • United States
  • 19 Oct 2018, 03:27
I am so sorry to hear this sad news ....I love the tribute you've written. We still expect our beloved Kippy to come running every time we open a can of tuna. She gave us so much love (and Siamese kittens twice!) That was 46 years ago. We still smile at all the photos we thankfully took. Am sending a virtual hug your way and wishing you love. Come back when you're ready. Love, Bonnie
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you very much, Bonnie. I love that you shared your story about Kippy... thank you! It's amazing how these sweet spirits touch us, isn't it? I really appreciate your comment and thoughts... and virtual hugs and love... Thank you, Bonnie! XOX
and you talk about my prose smile
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: smile My Dad's a writer, perhaps it's in the DNA...
Oh, Elizabeth. 12 years is a long time to develop such a connection of souls. I can't imagine the loss you'll feel, never having had a cat. Please take care of yourself in these days to come. My heart is with you.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you very much, Ginnie. She and Raina have been the constant in my life - from the Mesa... a deteriorating marriage, divorce, moving house, new relationship, re-marriage... The way Bella knew when I wasn't feeling well. She just always knew. XOX
  • Chris
  • Not nowhere
  • 19 Oct 2018, 06:29
Oh dear, this is all rather sad.

I don't really understand why you are having this parting of the ways..
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: I don't either, Chris... But perhaps we're not. It's just the physical world after all...
  • Astrid
  • Nederland
  • 19 Oct 2018, 06:38
My dear Elizabeth, I am so sorry that you have to say goodbye to Bella after all these precious years with her. I am not a cat person, however I am chosen by two cats that "I am okay" (and I adore them!!!).... so I know what you mean by "they choose you"...
I think she is beautiful and yes, I can feel your pain. These pictures are wonderful memories of her and she will live forever in your heart.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you so much, Astrid. There must be something about you that they see worthy! I'm convinced they know things about people... Thank you, for your kind comments.
  • Alan
  • Great Britain (UK)
  • 19 Oct 2018, 06:49
oh dear, that is so sad to read (I'm in tears). It sounds like she is nearing the end of her life. I know just how you feel. I still miss my two after many years since first mum Susie went and then dear old Sooty. I'm too emotionally weak to get others. sad
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: I'm so sorry to make you cry, Alan. :-( It' amazing how they work into our hearts, isn't it. It's not weakness, Alan - just heart protection.
  • Lisl
  • England
  • 19 Oct 2018, 07:47
Elizabeth, I know what you are going through. I love cats, and lost my two tabbies at the ages of 16 and 17 some year' ago. I miss them still. Stay strong
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Lisl. They do work themselves into our hearts, don't they. Such precious spirits. Thank you.
  • gutteridge
  • Somewhere in deep space
  • 19 Oct 2018, 08:32
After women I think that cats are the next most beautiful creatures.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: I might agree with you, Chad
excellent photo of Bella
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Alan
I cried when we had to put our cat to sleep, we had her for 22 years.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Awe - you softy, you... 22 years is a very long time for a cat. I bet you miss her, still.
  • Louis
  • South Africa
  • 19 Oct 2018, 11:11
Just this past week I saw a movie about Blue, a Red Dog. The father didn't want his son to have a dog. One of the reasons: "Because they die." Sigh, that is how it goes with these soul mates of ours. Commiserations and let Frank hug you.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Yep... I understand.
They are such spirits aren't they...
Thank you.... if only he weren't 5000 miles away. Tough timing.
You made me cry. She is my friend too though we did not meet in person. Accept my deepest condolences and sorrow. I witnessed every Saturday that she had a wonderful life with you. Hugs. (I have never typed that ending before.)
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Awe - I'm sorry, Mary. I'm so glad you were so touched by Bella's presence... I did the best I could for her, and I hope she was happy.
Thank you so much for the hugs... XOX
  • Anne
  • United Kingdom
  • 19 Oct 2018, 15:01
How sad for you, but how wonderful that she has enriched your life so much. Thinking about you.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Anne. I am very blessed.
We have read your very sad story Elizabeth, it is easy to tell from your Saturday postings just what Bella means to you and Frank. Whatever her fate is over the next period of time I hope it is peaceful, I just feel it is a shame that Frank can't be there with you at this very sad time.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you so much for your kind words, Brian. Very sweet, and I hope you're right - that she's at peace...
It was tough timing, without Frank here, for sure. But we'll be alright. And together in 12 days...
I know how you feel. We lost our last cat last year and said we would not have any more. They become such a part of the family. Even now we half expect Kammy to appear when we get home.

Your Bella was a lovely cat.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: They do work their way into our hearts, don't they. And they'll always be there.
Thank you, Bill...
I hAVE TEARS IN MY EYES READING THIS She is a sweet looking kitty. I a sad for all of you.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Ruthie... and for looking at her photos on FB... She certainly was sweet. Thank you. XOX
i am very sad for you Elizabeth and i can't see any way that you could have memorialized Bella any better than this prose...

our sympathy... Penny and ....petersad
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you so much, Penny & Peter. XOX
  • Ayush Basu
  • Venlo, Netherlands
  • 19 Oct 2018, 17:44
oh, i am so sorry to hear that, Elizabeth, that was a touching bit of text and those are worthy images to remember Bella by.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, very much, Ayush.
A lovely cat, and wonderful memories - my Aby, Sassy, is similarly loving.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Tom... And Sassy's getting on, isn't he. It's always so difficult. Enjoy him will you have him - hopefully a long time, yet.
  • Harry
  • USA
  • 20 Oct 2018, 05:40
a sad event, good documentation
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Harry
  • Beth
  • United States
  • 20 Oct 2018, 13:58
I am so sorry for your loss. She certainly was a beauty and I hope you will find comfort in the wonderful photos you have taken over the years.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Beth. Yes she was - and a very special little spirit. XOX
  • Steven
  • Chicagoland
  • 20 Oct 2018, 16:28
Gorgeous photos of Bella captured here!! A very heartfelt tribute! My apologies for your loss.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Steven.. Much appreciated.
Your loving tribute to Bella has touched my heart, Elizabeth, and I can feel your deep pain and loss. You were very lucky to have her enrich your life while she was here with you.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you so much, Beverly... I appreciate your kind words. I certainly was lucky - she was a very special girl. XOX
  • Ray
  • Thailand
  • 22 Oct 2018, 00:40
What a lovely post...
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you, Ray.
  • sherri
  • Little Rock, Arkansas, USA
  • 23 Oct 2018, 01:14
her beauty is stunningly elegant

i'm so very sorry
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you so much, Sherri. She was very special... and yes - very elegant.
So sad. Always heart wrenching when a beloved pet companion leaves.
Elizabeth Croston Buckalew: Thank you very much, Graeme... Yes - and she and I were particularly close.

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